...not minding my own business...

Let's make a memory!

2010-02-20T11:10:00.000-08:00

I would always coin that phrase when I was with special people, going to special places. I love making memories. They endure. Unless of course at the end of the day, old age steals it away. Every feeling I can think of, love, companionship, happiness, even sadness, can spark up a memory. I love going back to them, what they bring back to me. So don't think those little gestures go unnoticed. They'll revisit like an old friend. Make your own memories. you'll always be part of someones life.

...before you judge...

2010-01-16T09:09:00.001-08:00

Imagine for a moment, you’re one of the poor, and you’re a Haitian. Hot, dusty climate where your meal for the day is the biggest challenge. Your dress is tattered and you have no shoes. Eating mud cookies to make your stomach thinks it’s full. Never really satisfying the hunger pains tho the cramps have long gone. Trying to console your young siblings because mama’s milk has dried up from malnutrition. School is not an option and you don’t know how to read and write. You don’t even have an understanding of what it’s like outside of Haiti, or how to survive. You, only out of ignorance, know how to break it down. Then, the only thing that seemed secure, the land you live on, breaks apart. The shaking has toppled every structure in your city. Two families, eight of you lived on the second floor of a one room concrete hut. Now everything has crumbled, smashing everything in it’s way. It’s dark and you’re in pain, people are screaming, crying out for their families. You hear your little sister but you cannot get to her. Hours go past and some of the crying stops. The eerie silence frightens you more than your parched throat, the heavy concrete trapping your body, your pain. It’s dark and you’re afraid. You feel like rescue won’t come and more hours pass. Your body and mind become numb and you start to get a bit delusional. You think you see Jesus, and all you ask for is water. More hours go past and you know in time, this will be your tomb. You don’t remember but the rescuers heard you singing, and that’s how they found you, after 10 more hours of digging with their hands, they, your people, lifted your limp, broken body out of the rubble. You were trapped for 62 long hours and everyone was amazed you had survived. You told them you saw Jesus before you slipped off into subconsciousness.

You wake up in a makeshift tent, cardboard and twine keeping your broken legs together and a new wave of pain invades your body. Uncle is with you and gives you the sad news that everyone has died and you go numb again. All you want is the comfort of your mama. You can’t imagine living through the trauma you just went through. Afraid the earth is going to shake again, swallowing everything up. Another day goes by and you finally get medical help. You’re one of the lucky ones, you didn’t die from your injuries. Uncle keeps asking where the help is? Everyone is starving, so very hungry, and need water. People are dying everywhere in the streets and being left behind. Have you ever seen a dead person? Can you even imagine your loved ones in the street and you have to leave them. The stench of death can’t be escaped as their bodies begin to bloat and become unrecognizable. Soon, they’ll all be piled in huge pits, and unceremoniously, buried.

So please people, don’t judge the Haitians when they run for fear of tsunamis. Don’t judge them when they fight for food, for that will decide life or death to them. Don’t judge them when they get frustrated help has not arrived, for they don’t see it. They’re not watching CNN like us, with our belly’s full. They don’t see all the countries pitching in. The bottle-necked airport. Trucks leaving in fear because of disorder in handing out supplies.

Please don’t judge the Haitians because they were born in a land of poverty and unrest. Don’t judge them because they lived through the most horrible tragedy of their lives. Don’t judge them because they are wounded, hungry, grief stricken and homeless.

Just help.

So it's Socal.

2010-01-09T12:14:00.000-08:00

We've moved.
To southern California.
Here are things I've observed thus far:
1. Hollywood is only glamorous if you're a star.
2. You can live on a nice street and the next can be sketchy.
3. The weather is glorious.
4. You can be in the mountains or on the beach in an hour or two.
5. There are thousands of yucca trees in the desert!
6. LA freeways aren't so scary.
7. 'Normal' people really live here.
8. Most everyone seems friendly.
9. Job market not too great, but then again, we're in a recession.
10.The 'corn man' ringing his bell at night is quite endearing.
11. They name their ditches.

Dear Theresa

2009-11-08T00:33:00.000-08:00

Dear Theresa,
I often wonder where you are. Has the road of days gone by led you to some fair place? Or are you still in the land of childhood memories?
I look for you when I go back, the white pages never seem to turn you up. I hope the social networks find you well, and I keep searching...
...searching for time lost, wanting to recapture some part of me that's gone...
Dear Theresa, has the years treated you well? Remember the Wedgewood days? Quickies, cops, runnin' and pot?
Listening to the best music ever. Bowie, Hendrix, T Rex, always kept our head in the mix.
Hanging out over on Powell, with the cool kids and the foxes. Long hair, hip huggers and halters...your a fond memory now.
Mum said you called once, but I was too busy doing something,
I wished I hadn't missed your connection, now I fear a lost rejection.
I did get to California, have you? Long lost pact, I got here and had forgotten.
I'm not sure if the road I took was less traveled, but it certainly had it's stops.
I still look for you, trying to recapture some part of me that's lost...

pulled in, piled on, pushed out...a corporate prose

2009-10-05T08:16:00.000-07:00

you pulled me in, making me think how invaluable i was
my degree tweaked your interest, my experience impressed your needs
like the sprinter in the 60 metre, i reached those rungs with ease
you piled it on, with long hours and exasperating deadlines
and i was caught up in a constant corporate whirl
the more you patted, the higher the rung, and i kept running
my work was immeasurable, my reputation did precede
but all zones have their limits and comfort isn't in it
your pats finally started to pull me down, and you finally,
pushed me out...

wait staff 101

2009-09-27T20:08:00.001-07:00

We had a bad experience in a restaurant today at Pier 39 in Fisherman's Wharf. I felt bad as I really hyped it up for my boyfriend who hadn't gone before. After a brief waiting period we were escorted to our seats. I used to waitress and also manage restaurants, so I'm more aware of what goes on. I notice the girl who appears to be our server, has the one side section where we're seated and it's kind of busy. She had passed us 3 times without acknowledging us or giving us eye contact. We continued to wait. The busboys came and went, cleaning tables around us, not looking at us. She came again and went. The hostesses were seating people but, oblivious to what was going on around them. I told my boyfriend, wow, this is pretty bad service already, he suggested we wait a bit to see how long it was going to take. I saw a man who I would say was the manager, and he was looking in our direction talking to another employee, but even he, even he didn't come around to help. Wow. We never did get service, by this time, I'm pretty pissed and we decide to leave. We told the hostesses why we were leaving and just left. I didn't even ask to speak to the manager, my words would have fallen on deaf ears.
Seriously, I expect excellent service when going out. I know the drill. You rely on your tips, especially in America. I used to only make $2.13 an hour plus tips (south texas). That hardly cuts it. It actually MADE me a good waitress. If I go somewhere and the server is grumpy, it really ruins my whole experience. I think the business is a reflection of it's managers, as the employees are.
So, we ended up going to one of our favorite places down the street. Totally different. Our server was on top of his game, personable and smiling. Our experience was pleasant and he fulfilled our every need. I tipped him well. Before leaving, I asked to speak to the manager. I told him I've always had excellent service and food there, but today was exceptional, and Uriel was fantastic. That put a big ol smile on his face. That server reflected him and his establishment.

So people, here are a few tips:

1. Don't wait more than 3 minutes to approach my table-leaving me sit unacknowledged is really annoying.
2. Eye contact always-avoiding our gaze makes me think your well, avoiding us.
3. If you can't make it to the table right away, stop by and tell us you'll be right back to take our order-this will make or break your tip.
4. Real busy, and you can't get to us at all? have a hostess, busboy or manager come, greet and take our drink order-believe me, once we have drinks we're happy.
5. Smile, smile, smile-a lot of us out here are great tippers and we expect a friendly server-that will make or break your tip.
6. Don't overwhelm us with your presence, but be aware of whats going on and stop by at least once during the meal-if I'm drinking coffee, please keep my cup filled.
7. You'll know how much to approach us, a friendly chat now and then will make us think your just the sweetest thing-and we'll want to tip you well.
8. Please take care of us and whatever we need, if it's broke, please fix it-we are paying you for this.
9. When you drop off the bill, please don't say 'this is where you put the tip'-that only makes us very irritable.
10. Please don't go running after us, saying we forgot to leave a tip-there probably was good reason why we didn't.
11. If you give me bad service, I'm going to tell your manager-if you give me good service, I'm going to tell your manager.
12. Remember, don't stereotype anybody -treat everybody the same, always.

When to draw the line...

2009-09-23T18:48:00.000-07:00

What's going on in America these days? It's horrific. Children being abused, neglected and killed left and right, most of the time by their own parents! The age old question, why have them, if you don't want or take care of them? I can't imagine murdering anyone let alone a child. Such sad times. People may question, where was CPS during those times? It seems a hit and miss with them. Take the Garrido case, Phillip was a registered sex offender and even served time in prison for the rape and kidnapping of a woman. Where was CPS then? Check out that story here.

Then you have the story about the Demaree's who had their children taken away from them for a month after dropping off photos to be developed at Walmart. The lab tech reported the 'bath-time' pictures to CPS. Read their story, because it could easily happen to you. I feel sorry for those children who didn't know or understand what was going on, and not being with their parents for a whole month! Seriously, things are getting out of hand. Just when do you draw the line?

Check out these other tragic stories:

Haleigh Cummings: missing

Caylee Anthony: deceased

Hasanni Campbell: missing

Adji Desir: missing

National Center For Missing Children

Americas Most Wanted Missing Children

Lock up your sons, the cougars are coming!

2009-08-31T21:16:00.000-07:00

Mrrrawwwwwww!

So what's the big fuss anyway? Men and women have been doing it since the beginning of time. For some reason, it seems more prevalent nowadays. There's even a reality show called "Cougar." Pick up any tabloid and you'll find an article about Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher, Linda Hogan & Charlie Hill, or Halle Berry & Gabriel Aubry.

Check this:

Wikipedia's definition of cougar: a stalk and ambush predator

Urban dictionary's definition of cougar: an older woman who frequents clubs in order to score with a much younger man

I think the difference lay between cougars, or women who hunt younger men for personal or sexual reasons and women who just happen to have a younger boyfriend. Meaning, she didn't hunt him down because he was young. I believe in the 'click' thing. And it's hard to find someone you click with, no matter how young or old you are. So if an older woman finds a younger man that she clicks with, then, the more power to her. And him.

I'm sure Cleopatra & Ptolemy weren't thinking they shouldn't be together because of their ages. Or Queen Elizabeth I and her one time fiancee Francois, Duke of Anjou. Oh wait, she may be the exception..haha..she was one hot tamale in her day, well, that's another story. :)

My boyfriend and I were taking a walk one day and he says "Did you see the way those older women were looking at you? They looked to you like an Oracle, waiting for advice as to how you did it!" That really cracked me up, as I don't see peoples reactions that way. When I'm with him, I don't see his age. "We just click man!"

Mrrrawwwwwww!

FAT COPS

2009-07-21T09:26:00.000-07:00

Cops make me nervous. I'm not sure why. They always have. Maybe it stems back to childhood hearing "if you don't be good the cops are gonna get ya"... As an adult, my palms still sweat if I have to talk to one. When I'm driving the speed limit I still brake when I see one. I sometimes fear a bad cop will throw me in jail just for the hell of it. I hope they're there tho, if I ever need them. Yet, I wish we didn't have fat cops. That really bugs me. I know there are standards, and they should have to adhere by them. The airlines wouldn't hire 'em. Hey, I'm no skinny minny, but I'm no cop either.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run. Dennis Miller

...nuff said.

MY AGONY

2009-06-25T10:00:00.001-07:00

I've had my share of emotional tragedies. Although inevitable, and unavoidable, death will cast it's cloak upon us all. There was a time a few years ago that I just seemed overwhelmed by the deaths in my family due to their untimely circumstantial passing. One morning, my agony was released when I awoke and put pen to paper. The following is an unedited version of what came to me. Hopefully it will help someone in their own torment and grief.

My Brother lay in a pool of his own blood. Words cannot describe how I felt when I myself received that dreaded call early one morning. All I could do was scream. How could this happen? A brother, a son, a nephew, a cousin, a friend, loved by all? A person so full of talent and life. The poet, the dreamer, the "one" who got things done. It felt like my heart was being wretched out of my skin, and I would walk miles to lay a single beautiful perfect rose upon his grave. Sitting there crying, talking, rejoicing in the life of the day, sharing news, stories, new songs. How could one who brought so much joy to others, bring so much pain? I still do not know if it were you who took that gun, and put it to your chest my brother, I do not know the events of that day. But you will always be in my heart, and even to this day, I pray that you are in that place, that peaceful place, in the midst of God, finally understanding all, knowing all, and loving all.

My husband lay there screaming in agony. A skeleton of a man, why would a disease such as this take the life, this beautiful life out of such a wonderful man? A husband, a father, a brother, a son, a cousin, a nephew, a brother-in-law, a friend, loved by all? My heart was slain when I found you that day. You would not let me take you to get help. You would not let me sleep by your side, nor have your son in the house that night. Yes, "they" say you know, when it's your time, yet it was not our time. A man so full of love for his family, who gave every waking moment tho in constant pain, to share the joys of childhood with his young son. You continued your life the best you knew how. You gave more to me and Joe in your short life, than anybody I know. You will always be in my heart, and even to this day, I pray that you are in that place, that peaceful place, in the midst of God, finally understanding all, knowing all, and loving all.

My mother lay there lifeless. The morphine riding her veins so as not to feel the pain of this tumor growing so rapidly in her beautiful body. A woman who was absolutely loved by all. A mother, a daughter, a wife, a sister, a cousin, a niece, a mother-in-law, a friend. There are no words to describe the look in your eyes, before you slipped off into unconsciousness. I wished I could take the pain from you, your fears. Yet, I rejoiced in hearing your last words..."HE IS HERE!" and tho it was hard to let you go, I finally had to take my grip from you, and let you slip away. I have you in my heart always, and will never forget the love that you had for me, and the sacrifices you gave for me. You brought such love and happiness to all those around you, and people were drawn to you like a magnet. I take your spirit with me everywhere I go, in this road that I travel now, and know that I will always have a piece of you in me, and in this I am content. You will always be in my heart, and even to this day, I pray that you are in that place, that peaceful place, in the midst of God, finally understanding all, knowing all, and loving all.

My sister, I was not with you the day your sweet young life was taken from you. My heart is still filled with such pain, such pain, that's so hard to bear. A sister, a daughter, a mother, a niece, a cousin, a friend. Where did you lose your way in life? If I could have seen, I would have kept you safe from harm. My baby sister, I'll always remember the good times, and keep your memory close at heart. You were loved by many, in your wake, this I seen. You touched many lives in your very own way, and you will not be forgotten. Your tragic ending bothers me to this day, the twisted metal of your coffin cannot be erased from my mind, yet, you will always be in my heart, and even to this day, I pray that you are in that place, that peaceful place, in the midst of God, finally understanding all, knowing all, and loving all.

PENNY CANDY

2009-06-02T14:27:00.001-07:00

I grew up in a small town atop a hill surrounded by woods. We had so much fun as kids. Stayed outside all day playing but had to be in before the street lights came on. High water low water, Annie Annie overhead, red-light green-light, hide n seek, the list goes on. Riding our bikes in the summer time. Skuffed knees and iodine soaked bandaids . Going to the playground and cooling off in the baby pool. Times were good. We used to play below the house in the woods near the trestle and play in the creek. (pronounced crick) The smell of sassafras, catching small crabs and laying in the wheat grass trying to figure out shapes in the clouds. But nothing beat going to the dime store at Ruth and Joe's and buying penny candy! What a treat for us kids. I remember a dime could fill up a small brown bag and we'd happily be on our way munching on our goodies.

Here are some of my favorites!

ARE YOU PREPARED?

2009-05-07T23:33:00.000-07:00

Everyone is subject to some sort of disaster. The question is, are you prepared? Depending on where you live can narrow things down a bit. For instance, I'll most likely go through a major earthquake if I stay in California. So, just how prepared am I? The electric goes out. The gas gets turned off. There's no water. My building is stable enough to stay but we're warned not to go outside. What do I do? I'll go through my apartment now to see how well we'd survive.

....since it's dark, I stumbled my way into the bedroom and phew, there's the flashlight in my nightstand drawer and it works! I check in my battery drawer but there's only 1 for the flashlight and it needs two. (mental note buy spare batteries!) I then go to the kitchen drawer and get out the tea lights and find the lighter. I remember I threw a bunch of matches away. :(

I then light the candles that's always set out and find only 2 extras on my office shelf. I don't have any stored water and only one 16 oz bottle left which equates to one toilet flush. My grocery order was put off. One bottle of grape juice, 7 beers, half box of wine, 2 boxes of lemonade and a few bottles of coke. That's it. Since I cannot cook and I don't have a grill, knowing everything in the fridge will eventually spoil I look to my cupboards. This will we our staple to survive the next few days or even weeks. A few cans of green beans, corn, peas, tuna, tomato soup and a box of granola bars. One loaf of bread. Half jar of peanut butter and a few bags of cashews. If push came to shove we'd have to start working on stuff like croutons, spaghetti sauce, cake mix, but I would hope we'd get help fast from Red Cross or FEMA.

I don't have a battery operated radio so I don't know what the situation is in our area. I don't have a first aid kit in the event one of us had been injured during the quake, I just found some small bandages in the medicine cabinet. We do have a lot of blankets, and my important papers all in one container. I check my wallet and I only have $4.00 in cash. I'm not sure how long it's going to take the banks to open. We'd survive for about a week on what I currently have at home, but that's it. We need to be more prepared, all of us. We can't rely on outside help, especially in the early stages. One of my friends who went through one of the hurricanes last year in south Texas said it took her 6 months to get any financial help from FEMA. When they did come, they brought them EXPIRED rations! Please don't rely on anyone but yourselves. Get prepared, be prepared...

K(ancer)

2009-04-17T08:55:00.001-07:00

...She would come into work with her infectious smile, bubbling with enthusiasm. Red flaming hair and freckled skin. She adored her young son and husband, and enjoyed being with us, her friends. We loved being around her, she had a way of brightening up one's day. I never, ever saw any negativity come from her, even when she, she.....
Felt a lump, and the doctor told her it was nothing. Said it was just probably a cyst and not to worry.
A few months later another doctor diagnosed her with breast cancer. I cannot begin to tell you what this woman had gone through. The mastectomy didn't work. The cancer spread. Chemotherapy and radiation didn't work. The cancer spread to her lymph nodes. Things weren't looking so good. She'd come to work with that bad wig, but she still had that infectious smile, I could tell the cancer was taking it's toll, but she was determined to beat it, and stay positive. Doctors tried every treatment available, and after the third round of chemo, the cancer spread through her bones. Her smile was weakening, defeat was starting to show, but she still trudged on the best she could, for her young family, her friends, me.
I remember telling them at work we should all shave our heads so Janine wouldn't feel so alone or isolated in her disease.
Then I felt the lump. Words cannot describe that feeling of impending doom. My first thoughts went to my own son who lost his father at age 8. What would become of him if I were gone too? Tortuous, tortuous moments in time. I didn't want him to go through that again. He didn't deserve this. My doctor whisked me to biopsy immediately. I caught it early. Laying on a cold gurney in the hallway waiting for my surgery...laughing at the power outage and blaming it on Friday 13th. They successfully removed the small lump and 13 lymph nodes. How ironic. I was so happy to be alive but it wasn't over yet. The doctor told me after one week of the chemo the hair would start to fall out, and true to the day it did. A friend shaved my head because I didn't want to wake up one morning with long hair spattering the pillow, that would be hard to handle. Being one of the lucky ones, I never got ill from the chemo, unlike Janine who went through a terrible time of it, all of it. I tried to remain positive like her, tho oddly enough, had a hard time talking to her about it. Maybe it was because mine didn't seem as bad as hers, and that made me feel a little guilty. When I went wig shopping I wanted to throw up. They were horrible, and MADE you look sick. I vowed from that day on, to wear my baldness in pride, with cute hats and bandanas. The radiation after the chemo left some burn scars, but that's all that's visible. Battle wounds. There are three things that got me through it. My very supportive family, Janine and her positive attitude, and spelling cancer Kancer. It's been 10 years, and I'm Kancer free.
Sweet, sweet Janine lost her life to it...

SO you wanna be on TOP?

2009-04-05T21:29:00.000-07:00

There's hope for us all. When I first saw America's Next Top Model, I refused to watch it thinking..'Goodgod, not another stupid reality show!' Well, now I love Sunday's all day run. I used to think all models were naturally beautiful even before makeup and airbrushing. Now I realize, these are just normal everyday gals. There's hope for us all. I've always wondered what I would look like, all made up and prettified. Back in the day I went to Glamour Shots and came out looking worse than when I went in. Was I the victim of someone's bad day, or first day? Hopefully sooner rather than later, before gravity takes it's final hold, I'll get that makeover I'm so curious about... :)

dear mr. postman...

2009-03-28T10:56:00.000-07:00

It used to be hard getting into the postal service. Nowadays it seems, having a pulse will do.
I mean seriously postal worker, after the third time stuffing a too big box in a too small mailbox, you'd learn by now???
Each time I wrote a nice note and taped it to my box, it took two days for you to get it out? I'm guessing you either didn't understand what I was asking or you don't understand English. I know you come twice a day. I stopped you on the street one day to ask you a very basic question, and you gave me that 'deer in the headlights' look. I see you huddled in doorways chatting to your friends and smoking. I'm pretty sure the postal service doesn't want you representing them in that way, makes me think your being lazy and slacking on the job. And oh yeah, please go to the next building and bring me the package that you delivered to the wrong place.

FACE your FEARS

2009-03-17T21:40:00.001-07:00

I hate spiders. Period. Big, small, hairy, jumping, crawling. I owe it all to Billy Andrews. When we were kids, we used to play in the woods below our house. The boys used to throw these banana spiders on us girls. That was the most horrifying thing I can remember as a child. He threw one spider too many and I threw the brick. I saw blood, and ran home crying. I don't
believe he ever threw another spider, but it left me fearing them.
~big, black, sharp scuttling creature
~hairy, brown eight legged foe
~creeping, crawling, jumping
...i'll always call you for
~stomping, squashing, swatting

Random Acts of STUPIDNESS

2009-03-13T14:45:00.000-07:00

To the lady who was walking her dog without a leash.
One small child in hand, a baby in the storage area UNDER the stroller and a BAG in the seat...
Just what were you thinking??
When the other fierce dog approached yours..you did pick up your child in hand...BUT
disregarded your baby as the other dog sniffed/nipped at it?
Just what were you thinking?

...runnin' from the POlice...

2009-02-07T00:05:00.000-08:00

...I hope you got your Timberlands
on tight,cause I ain't givin up
I'd rather duck these motherfsckers all night
I'm runnin'through the projects,beyotch
They'll never catch me
Cause I'm loc'd and trigger happy on the, sneotch
Don't say you never heard of me,til they murder me, I'm a legend
Do Thug Niggas go to heaven?
I'm rollin with the thorough heads
We gettin ghost on them hoes and yo
I got no love for the 5 - 0  I'm runnin' from the police...

I think Tupac was one of the greatest songwriters. He's pretty much
the only hip hop artist I listen to. I'm not too sure about all the
hoopla when he died, east coast, west coast territorial bullshit.
I think he was probably one of those guys who you 'felt good with'.
Kinda like being with the 'cool kids'. Another sad story about someone
so talented dying young. Kinda wraps up what everybody seems
to think. Maybe he faked his death,maybe he's in witness protection.
Irregardless,his music will live on. Check out this skit from Chappelle.
 (laugh on)

Pittsburgh's goin to the Suuuuper Bowl...

2009-01-23T17:52:00.000-08:00

...AGAIN!
I'm so excited! I really love Pittsburgh football. Especially the fans, whom I may add, are die HARD. I remember going to the games and getting all dressed up in Steeler attire. Tailgating in the parking lot grilling chicken and sausage, drinking Iron City and Coors Lite. Ahhhh, those were the days!!! I remember back in the day when 'the steel curtain' ruled, and passed an 'immaculate reception'...for over 25 years I'd often chant..'one for the thumb'...'one for the thumb'...
2006 was that year. Now, here we are again, and I'm reveling in the thoughts about how 'we' got here, and hopefully will win yet another title. Yeah, I'll don my Steeler jersey, wave the terrible towel, scream and yell, pace back and forth, jump up and down, bite my nails...but in the end, not far off, you'll hear a little voice saying...'one for the other thumb'...'one for the other thumb'...

Who would have thunk it?

2009-01-09T21:23:00.000-08:00

It would start with a hint of green. Everywhere. Little buds on the trees, new grass sprouting from the thawing ground. Lillie's popping up everywhere even surviving through the 'last snow'. The whole earth just seemed to come alive. All day thunderstorms, rain pitter pattering on the roof, hearing the thunder in the distance...one one thousand, two one thousand...everything just smelled so fresh. Toes squishing in warm mud puddles, rain drops on my tongue. Oh how I loved Spring!
Laying in the back yard, smelling fresh cut grass. The hot summer sun beating down on my face. Climbing the apple and cherry trees and eating the fruit till your tummy ached. Sitting on the porch at night watching the gazillion stars and listening to the crickets and frogs. Ice cold lemonade, digging around in the flower bed, long bike rides. Summer was so much fun!
Watching the leaves turn colors, raking them into piles, jumping in, only to have to rake them again...oh how I miss the smell of autumn leaves! Carving pumpkins, hayrides, pulling out the sweaters. Fall was my favorite time of year!
Dropping temperatures, snowstorms and staying home from school. Sled riding, building snowmen, hot dogs over an open fire. Big big snowflakes falling gently on my face. Eating icicles that hung from the eaves. Snow angels, runny noses and frost bit toes. Winter was a wintry blast!
I do miss the four seasons.
Here we have four seasons: cold/sunny, cold/rainy, cold/foggy, cold/cold.
California. Who would have thunk it?

...everybody does it!

2008-12-30T22:33:00.000-08:00

...I never used to do it around people. Empty aisles, alone in the car, the other room, storage closet..wherever people weren't, I was. Even that 4 letter word sounds embarrassing, let alone hearing it, or worse yet, smelling it. But, everybody does it. We'd joke and say that's what males do when they bond. We'd almost expect it out of guys, but not girls. Girls are supposed to be lady-like, right? We don't do stuff like that, at least out in public or around people. When I first met him, he used to say, 'I just wish girls would be themselves, and fart when they have to, because you know, everybody does it'....I would have been mortified, especially after just meeting him. But, I liked the way he thought, different than most guys. He wanted a natural gal, nothing fake about him, better be nothing fake about her. Then, one day, it kinda slipped out and I thought I would die. But he wasn't disgusted, he actually seemed quite amused. So, little by little I'd squeak em sneak em out. We'd laugh and sometimes run from each other. I've become so used to doing it, now I enjoy it. I think he wishes he never said 'he wishes girls would just do it'...

Can you name these movies?

2008-12-12T08:32:00.000-08:00

1. I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse.
2. Love means never having to say you're sorry.
3. A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.
4. If you build it, he will come.
5. We'll always have Paris.
6. Houston, we have a problem.
7. A boy's best friend is his mother.
8. I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog too.
9. Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
10. May the Force be with you.
11. You're gonna need a bigger boat.
12. What we've got here is failure to communicate.
13. They call me Mister Tibbs.
14. I'll be back.
15. Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape.
16. My mother thanks you. My father thanks you. My sister thanks you. And I thank you.
17. I feel the need — the need for speed.
18. Here's looking at you, kid.
19. Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.
20. I see dead people.
21. You had me at 'hello'.
22. Here's Johnny!
23. Elementary, my dear Watson.
24. Say hello to my little friend.
25. Hasta la vista, baby.

dexter

2008-12-07T20:29:00.000-08:00

I've always been fascinated by serial killers.
Karla Homolka, Albert Fish, Jeffrey Dahmer, Zodiac Killer, Aileen Wuornos.
Not to glorify, but I find them quite interesting.
Anddddd I don't necessarily like the idea of a T.V. show highlighting a serial killer either,
but oddly enough, this show is quite addicting and somewhat entertaining. It's so easy to like this guy, and although
I sometimes have to remind myself it's only a movie...one still tends to feel guilty about it. Their website foo foo's
it all up tho, not disparaging, but colorful enough to remind one that yes, it IS still just a show...maybe to thwart
wannabes and copycats.
All in all we have Michael C Hall at his best, too bad 6 Ft Under was laid to rest.

HAS JUSTICE BEEN SERVED???

2008-12-05T21:57:00.001-08:00

I say YES if he actually serves any time.

O.J. Simpson gets at least 15 years in prison

LAS VEGAS, Nevada (CNN) -- Former gridiron great O.J. Simpson will serve at least nine years in prison for his role in an armed confrontation with sports memorabilia dealers in a Las Vegas hotel in 2007.

O.J. Simpson told the judge Friday that he was sorry for what he did but didn't think it was wrong.

Simpson was sentenced to a maximum of 33 years after a rambling, emotional apology in which he told District Judge Jackie Glass, his voice shaking, that he was sorry for his actions but believed he did nothing wrong. Glass, however, brushed his apology aside, saying his actions amounted to "much more than stupidity," and calling him both arrogant and ignorant.

"Earlier in this case, at a bail hearing, I said to Mr. Simpson, I didn't know if he was arrogant, ignorant or both," Glass said. "During the trial and through this proceeding, I got the answer, and it was both."

She stressed that the sentence was not "payback for anything else," apparently referring to Simpson's acquittal 13 years ago in the slayings of his former wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend Ron Goldman.

little girl blue

2008-11-16T23:17:00.000-08:00

It had only been a year since I gave my barbies away. At fourteen I had my first job.
I felt proud, all grown up. I wanted to go camping with her. She was a few years older than me yet I was permitted to go. It was all so innocent. Her father caused me to lose my first job, he didn't like his brother. But I still wanted to go. I had a new blue flowered swimsuit. Still childlike, puberty had not quite set in. I was so excited. Her uncle was much much older, he seemed real cool. The wild child.
I don't remember the ride, or where we stayed.
But I remember a young girl with long blond hair in the playground not much younger than myself. He said he was 'waiting' for her to grow up. She looked so innocent swinging on the swing. Something didn't feel right, but at that age, I was unsure of what it was. He confessed the purpose of me going was 'to be with him', but I was confused yet relieved when he said it was not to be. I often wondered later whose saving grace that was? I remember going to some cabins and my friend drifted off. I stayed behind at the campfire. I was feeling abandoned yet liked the new attention. The guys around the campfire treated me like their peer, drinking a beer, I felt
woozy right away, and one guy kept me from falling into the fire. As a Neil Young song played, he began to tell me a story. In his rage, he told me about four college students getting killed in Ohio. I had no idea what had happened, I just remember his intense face. I often wonder what happened to him. Had he himself gone on to college? Head mass demonstrations for fallen causes? Did his intense excitement stay kindled, or did his causes die like those flickering flames?

Proposition 8

2008-11-05T21:49:00.000-08:00

To be quite honest, it's safe inside the box. Let me explain. I was brought up 'in the church'. A marriage is between and man and a woman, etc. etc. I think what bothers people who don't believe in same sex relationships or marriages is what it can do to them. It's scary for various reasons. One, it may purely disgust them. Two, they may be afraid of being turned on. Three, they may be afraid their straight partner would turn. I can't imagine any other reasons.
It's easy to judge, but hard to understand.
Therefore I tried looking inside my own box to see if I could come up with some sort of equivalent.
I grew up in a white town. No blacks to this day live there. I never really thought about it, really. I met my white husband, had a child, nice home, dog, you know the story. Many years later, long after my husband, I meet a black man. We started as friends chatting. I liked what was in his head. I was later surprised to find out he wasn't white. All of a sudden, it didn't seem to matter. What came back to me, was years earlier, learning in church, to accept people for who they were, that black was just a color of skin, as is white, and so on. I don't see him as being black, I see him as being a man...
If my state where to pass a law and say it's against the law to wed a black man, I think I'd be pretty pissed too. You may not understand it. But, I do. It's okay if you don't understand it. I'm living it. I'm happy, so you can leave me alone. I guess we should let those who are for same sex marriages alone too. They understand it. They're living it. Let's leave them alone. Let's let them get married too.

MAcabre

2008-10-11T18:10:00.000-07:00

...I've been sensing you, but I'm not afraid.
...I've always wondered what truly happened, that cold, cold morning.
...had the fires long been diminished? Or did it need another coal?
...did harsh words start your day? So many questions, were there
questions? Or did everyone accept your fate?
...did grief blind those about you? Or did a thief steal their sight?
...I was on the outside peering in, my silent questions lay unanswered, tho I dared not ask.
...bruises I was told...I was afraid to look..tho they fixed you up as pretty as you've always been.
...a long staircase and the stench of blood. Was that just grief stricken madness, totally consumed?
...I don't know what truly happened on that cold, cold morning, but I know you're here, and I am not afraid.
(...and she sadly pushed herself away from me...like a boat gently pulling away from shore)

Roman Polanski

2008-10-04T19:36:00.000-07:00

Spooky and I just watched 'The Ninth Gate' again which led us into a discussion about Roman Polanski. He was accused in 1977 of drugging and raping Samantha Geimer who was 13 at the time at Jack Nicholson's place. Polanski jumped bail and fled to France. Lots of stories going around, even about Geimer and her mother. And speaking of her mother, just where was she when all of the proposed took place? Seriously, who would let her 13 year old daughter alone with ANYBODY. I don't know if he did it. I don't know if the rumors are true about them either. Shame on him if he did, shame on them if they were.

The Color of Perfection??

2008-09-19T22:28:00.000-07:00

...Is not Korean.
The Korean Air commercial really cracks me up. The ad wants to portray the airlines as:
breathtaking
exquisite
visionary
graceful
understanding
pledging
admiring
but it uses people of other ethnicity's to portray their own (excellence?)
I think that commercial is disrespectful to their own country. The Color of perfection they're trying to portray is everything but the Korean if you go by that ad. As a matter of fact, the woman at the end is still looking for it......

FRIDA KAHLO -July 6,1907 - July 13,1954

2008-09-13T22:51:00.000-07:00

We went to Frida's exhibition today. It was really interesting yet it left a somber affect on me. Her life seemed so tragic, much of it portrayed in her works. I loved seeing the actual paintings, I wondered what thoughts brought each stroke of the brush. I wanted so much to reach out and touch her art, maybe as if I were reaching out to her? Why does an artist become more famous when one is dead? Back in the day, she was only known as Diego Rivera's wife. Today, she is Frida Kahlo~Mexican Artist.

'I hope the exit is joyful-and I hope never to return'...Frida

My favorite Frida pics.

2008-09-13T22:31:00.001-07:00

Is it really necessary?

2008-09-06T23:21:00.001-07:00

I swear, I used to like dogs.
Till, I moved to the city. Now, I just feel sorry for them. I live on a pretty busy street, and I do believe there are more people here with dogs than kids. They take them into banks, restaurants, stores...Try doing that back east..HA! Stores put water bowls out for them on the sidewalks. You occasional step in their crap because mommie & daddie 'forgets' to pick it up. You cannot walk down the street anymore without seeing pit bulls, pugs, hounds, poodles, labs. The only exercise they get is when their owners go down the street to buy a latte. These are stay at home dogs with their stay at home moms. You see that doggie stroller up there? It's a whopping $119.00. I mean at least let the dog get some EXERCISE!!! And stop acting like those animals are babies, because they are not.

MONEY CAN'T BUY YOU LOVE.....

2008-09-01T20:18:00.000-07:00

.....OR CAN IT???
I am as content in my life as I can be. I've always said, 'money can't buy you love'. You have to find what makes you happy, and BE happy in life. Everything else will/should fall into place. I think well, this is my existence, this is what's on my plate, what's been handed down to me. Why complain??? Yeah, I'd be nice to have a ton of money to do those things you see on t.v.....fly to exotic countries, a nice house by the sea, drive a fancy car, not ever have to work... go to fancy parties..well, you get the idea. Instead I am happy to settle with flying across the states, renting a house by the beach, driving a nicerER rental car, not having to work for a week, dressing up for a wedding....well, you get the idea. So, why should I complain? Am I complaining??? Yet, there is always a reminder, this picture that haunts me from time to time...It was a picture of a mansion with a Lamborghini parked outside...and underneath the caption: 'the rewards of higher learning.'
Yep, there it is. Nobody's fault but mine, really. I wonder why I never had the initiative or drive to do more, go farther?? Is it a fault??? Sometimes those rich people end up on drugs, unhappy and sometimes dead before their time anyway...Maybe I would appreciate life more, if I had to work harder for things??? Ahhhh, who knows??? I think being happy is the key to life. How cliche, eh? And, it's really hard sometimes knowing what that is. If you find it, you'll enrich your life, and live long. I think that's what it's all about. But seriously folks, I still want that watermelon tourmaline ring, that house on the beach, that older pale green Mercedes that woman was driving around the other day, not having to work, and not having to worry about money.....'the rewards of higher learning'......

...my circle of friends...

2008-08-14T21:29:00.000-07:00

a true friend is a good friend indeed...
end to end...meet my circle of friends...

cindy cindy...what can i say?...every time you entered a room, it brightened
up...always smiling and full of energy...ever giving, ever loving...the most
thoughtful person...i miss our margaritas...and strong strong coffee!...girls
night out...the first true texan i met...you'll always be an island girl to me...
keeping up with the latest movies and fashion...spoiling my sabby...
i know you'll always be there for me...i really do miss you...

sue...i met you at a shindell show...and liked you instantly...we've kept
in touch and i'm so glad...i'd say to my family...'she's the most down to earth
and nicest person i've ever met'...'good people'...i like to say...sometimes
years will go by, but when we meet, it's like we never left...i loved visiting
you in pittsburgh...overnight trips to shows and forgotten pajamas! ...the trip
to baltimore...staying with your folks...eating my first crab cake~and loving it!...
i wish santa fe would have been longer...no matter what...your a true friend indeed,
and thanks for being there...i miss you...

loretta...my confidante...hours and hours together, always there when i needed
you...your shoulder to cry on...we'd leave our doors open...your beauty portrays
everything you do...paintings...the artists garden...cooking...lovely lovely plated
dinners making me feel special...surprise birthday baskets with fresh hibiscus...
girls night out...themed parties...remember the belly dancing???...our costumes...food...dancing?...taking those soul walks on the beach...meditating...
harboring me when i was scared of the hurricane...
thanks for always being there for me...i miss you friend...

rosie...so special...do you really know what a gem you are?...i used to love going
to town and listening to that new fav song of ours over and over again...meeting
for breakfast and fighting over the check!...i've always been so proud of you...
your accomplishments...ever learning...soaking up knowledge like a sponge...being
there for each other thru the tough & good times...you'll always be older than me,
but you'll always look younger than me!...your beautiful inside and out...
you'll always be there for me...i miss you mi amiga...

carolyn...the most generous person i know...always wanting and trying to help
someone out...and me many times...your an inspiration...a go getter!...the sky is
the limit for you...and you'll go far...i loved the parties at your condo...pizza and
drinks at the hot tub!...meeting for the best margaritas in town and watching the
sun go down over the bay...dancing barefoot at the wanna wanna...hearing you laugh...
i love to hear you laugh!...your one of a kind...
thanks for being there for me...let's meet for margaritas cuz i miss you my friend...

marilyn...you have such a sweet gentle spirit...i'm proud to call you my friend...
remember the 'card' parties??...that was so fun!...your mystic nature, a true gift...
your beauty shines inside and out...always caring...ever loving...going to listen to you sing...dressing up for halloween...meditating...you always had our best interest at heart...
yes, such a sweet gentle spirit...and i know your there for me...
thank you friend...

terry...watching our kids grow...coffee on the swing...you made me my
first kahlua and creme~and i hated it!...exchanging plants and
flowers for our gardens...meeting at 1 am for breakfast at
eat n park...listening to each others troubles and triumphs...buying
me bath&bodywork products when i couldn't afford it...
calling me every other day to just shoot the breeze...always being
there for me, no matter what...i miss you
dear friend...rest in peace now...

...killer side effects!

2008-08-01T19:51:00.000-07:00

Whilst watching commercials I can't help but laugh sometimes at the ridiculous ads about drugs and their side effects. I decided to highlight the drug Prozac, which is an antidepressant to treat well, depression. Also prescribed for eating, obsessive compulsive and panic disorders. The ads on TV take up all the time to tell us what side effects could occur when taking their drug. I guess they have to say it, or they could get sued. I guess they have to say almost any side effect they can think of...so they won't get sued. If your disease won't kill ya, your pill might...check this out.

'less serious side effects'

drowsiness, dizziness, weakness
runny nose, sore throat, headache, flu symptoms
nausea, diarrhea, changes in appetite
weight changes; decreased sex drive, impotence, or difficulty having an orgasm
dry mouth, increased sweating

'serious side effects'

seizure (convulsions)
tremors, shivering, muscle stiffness or twitching
a red, blistering, peeling skin rash; problems with balance or coordination
agitation, confusion, sweating, fast heartbeat

If you ask me every one of these side effects seem to cause every disorder it is prescribed for.

David Lynch: The concept of absurdity is something I'm attracted to.

2008-07-13T17:32:00.000-07:00

Here on out I shall refer to 'the boyfriend' as 'spooky'. He first introduced me to David Lynch's 'Mulholland Dr.'
I was so upset at that film, which to me at the time made no particular sense.
In retaliation, I made him watch 'Steel Magnolias'. .
In fairness to all involved, I gave it a second go round...and came out with nothing more than a little better understanding of Lynch...sorta.
Then I watched 'Eraserhead'. David's first experimental film, and oddly enough, I really liked it.
It's the one I had David sign when we met him. He, of course, was promoting his last film~ 'Inland Empire', which I have not been able to sit through all of yet. That's kind of how I am with Lynch's films. I do like Twin Peaks tho. And Elephant Man.
He dabbles in art, photography and even sings. He's such an odd duck. Quack quack...

oh yeah:
You know how stupid we get sometimes when we meet someone famous? Well, after standing in the long line for Lynch's autograph, spooky and I both were wondering what we were going to say to him. Didn't want to sound dorky, yet cool. I wanted to play it cool. Maybe he'd take one look at me and want to cast me in his next film? Maybe he'd see how unnerved I was and invite us for drinks? There's so many questions I wanted to ask him, but had to be just the right one. Just didn't want to sound like another fan. So, I get up there, and everything happened so fast, I say something real blase like: 'thanks so much for coming', and David says 'no~thank YOU. He signs my DVD and I'm moved along. I seriously don't even remember him looking up at me. I guess I may have been the two-thousandth person that day. Or, maybe he was rushing everyone cuz he had to pee?
At the end of the day I can say, I met him, got my picture and autograph. But David, at the end of the day, you didn't get me.

...how natural is that disaster??

2008-07-10T20:51:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning thinking about all of the natural disasters going on in our world.
Starting at home from the fires that's eating up California, to the hurricanes on our 3 coasts, tornadoes and floods in the mid west. Let's not forget tsunamis and earthquakes in Asia, severe drought and famine in Africa. I woke up thinking this surely is God's way of purging the earth. We've abused and used it for too long. It's natures way.....really. Ironically enough, I find out that today is 'World Population Day' in which we have reached an unprecedented 6.7 billion people, and continues to grow 80 million people each year. What shall befall us next??? One thing is for sure...the earth will continue to crack and swallow us.. the sky will continue to blow and suck us up... the waters will continue to wash us away....the fires will continue to consume us...or......will the selfishness of one country demand our fate?

FOURTH OF JULY!

2008-07-04T12:52:00.000-07:00

...July 4th...whilst my boyfriend wanders about the English countryside..I'll be trying to catch the fireworks through the fog tonight...well, just another day.....for me that is.
For some people, they received their citizenship today. Which made me think for a minute...about the test they have to take...could YOU fellow American, pass this test????

1. What are the colors of our flag?

2. How many stars are there in our flag?

3. What color are the stars on our flag?

4. What do the stars on the flag mean?

5. How many stripes are there in the flag?

6. What color are the stripes?

7. What do the stripes on the flag mean?

8. How many states are there in the Union?

9. What is the 4th of July?

10. What is the date of Independence Day?

11. Independence from whom?

12. What country did we fight during the Revolutionary War?

13. Who was the first President of the United States?

14. Who is the President of the United States today?

15. Who is the vice-president of the United States today?

16. Who elects the President of the United States?

17. Who becomes President of the United States if the President should die?

18. For how long do we elect the President?

19. What is the Constitution?

20. Can the Constitution be changed?

21. What do we call a change to the Constitution?

22. How many changes or amendments are there to the Constitution?

23. How many branches are there in our government?

24. What are the three branches of our government?

25. What is the legislative branch of our government?

26. Who makes the laws in the United States?

27. What is the Congress?

28. What are the duties of Congress?

29. Who elects the Congress?

30. How many senators are there in Congress?

31. Can you name the two senators from your state?

32. For how long do we elect each senator?

33. How many representatives are there in Congress?

34. For how long do we elect the representatives?

35. What is the executive branch of our government?

36. What is the judiciary branch of our government?

37. What are the duties of the Supreme Court?

38. What is the supreme court law of the United States?

39. What is the Bill of Rights?

40. What is the capital of your state?

41. Who is the current governor of your state?

42. Who becomes President of the United States if the President and the vice-president should die?

43. Who is the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court?

44. Can you name thirteen original states?

45. Who said, "Give me liberty or give me death."?

46. Which countries were our enemies during World War II?

47. What are the 49th and 50th states of the Union?

48. How many terms can the President serve?

49. Who was Martin Luther King, Jr.?

50. Who is the head of your local government?

51. According to the Constitution, a person must meet certain requirements in order to be eligible to become President. Name one of these requirements.

52. Why are there 100 Senators in the Senate?

53. Who selects the Supreme Court justice?

54. How many Supreme Court justice are there?

55. Why did the Pilgrims come to America?

56. What is the head executive of a state government called?

57. What is the head executive of a city government called?

58. What holiday was celebrated for the first time by the Americans colonists?

59. Who was the main writer of the Declaration of Independence?

60. When was the Declaration of Independence adopted?

61. What is the basic belief of the Declaration of Independence?

62. What is the national anthem of the United States?

63. Who wrote the Star-Spangled Banner?

64. Where does freedom of speech come from?

65. What is a minimum voting age in the United States?

66. Who signs bills into law?

67. What is the highest court in the United States?

68. Who was the President during the Civil War?

69. What did the Emancipation Declaration do?

70. What special group advises the President?

71. Which President is called the "Father of our country"?

72. What Immigration and Naturalization Service form is used to apply to become a naturalized citizen?

73. Who helped the Pilgrims in America?

74. What is the name of the ship that brought the Pilgrims to America?

75. What are the 13 original states of the U.S. called?

76. Name 3 rights of freedom guaranteed by the Bill of Rights.

77. Who has the power to declare the war?

78. What kind of government does the United States have?

79. Which President freed the slaves?

80. In what year was the Constitution written?

81. What are the first 10 amendments to the Constitution called?

82. Name one purpose of the United Nations?

83. Where does Congress meet?

84. Whose rights are guaranteed by the Constitution and the Bill of Rights?

85. What is the introduction to the Constitution called?

86. Name one benefit of being citizen of the United States.

87. What is the most important right granted to U.S. citizens?

88. What is the United States Capitol?

89. What is the White House?

90. Where is the White House located?

91. What is the name of the President's official home?

92. Name the right guaranteed by the first amendment.

93. Who is the Commander in Chief of the U.S. military?

94. Which President was the first Commander in Chief of the U.S. military?

95. In what month do we vote for the President?

96. In what month is the new President inaugurated?

97. How many times may a Senator be re-elected?

98. How many times may a Congressman be re-elected?

99. What are the 2 major political parties in the U.S. today?

100. How many states are there in the United States today?

WHY, WHY, WHY?

2008-07-01T21:38:00.000-07:00

...does the bus always leave right before you get to the stop?
...do you hear more complaints than compliments?
...is pot illegal and alcohol isn't?
...do we have an appendix?
...can't I sleep when I know I have to wake up?
...are skinny women taken more serious?
...can't people refrain from hitting?
...do we fear the unknown?
...settle for less?
...do I have to press 1 for English?
...don't I like sushi?
...has our nation become complacent?
...is the Mac hated?
...why do I even wonder why?

...how does it feel to be an american?

2008-06-13T16:16:00.000-07:00

My boyfriend asks me from time to time. He always laughs at my answers. I think he's being cynical. He knows he speaks the truth.
I wear my defenses like masks from the truth.
My European boyfriend could very well be just as American as myself.
Literally.
We went shopping for him to take gifts home...something that they could see was from and made in America.
Everything I found is made in China. In Nicaragua. In Mexico.
That's nothing new to us.
It's not some new revelation.
It just really hit me, not for the first time........just again.

hey ms american
its me again
trying to buy a cardigan
from the state i'm in

our american cars
have foreign parts
plastic toys from
unknown parts

american made it may say
american money you will pay
american delivered not today
american bred......no way!

hey ms american
can't you see the state i'm in
still trying to find that cardigan
it's left my head in a whirl again

...technically trumped

2008-06-07T01:02:00.000-07:00

I thought by the year 2000 we'd be technically far more advanced than what we are. (Truly.) And to think, color t.v. was only introduced to the American public in 1950! Only 58 short years ago.
I remember thinking the year 2000 will have us flying about in saucers in orbit or glass enclosed communities on other planets. Growing up watching the Jetson's and Lost In Space really kind of paved the way for my future thinking, I think the destruction of our planet will eventually force us to go 'up'....
And to think, the 21st century still has us riding about on 4 wheels, cooking over heat or open flame, living in cave-like dwellings.
I feel ripped off in the sense I probably won't live to see the day of advanced technology...that is...if we get that far...just what will our future bring????

GOODBYE MAY

2008-05-31T10:59:00.000-07:00

Since my birth month is hours away from ending, I'd like to share some things that I like, in no particular order. :)

the color green
being a mom
watermelon motifs
toes squishing in mud
frozen peach margaritas
horse hooves on pavement
all day thundershowers
chocolate & almonds
snuggling with him
tropical islands
lipstick
girlfriend night
smell of crayons
waves crashing on the shore
good cologne
granmas tamales
fresh cut grass
silver jewelry
road trips
quality handbags
taking pictures
homemade pumpkin pie
fall leaves rustling
giggling
finding cool shells
kennywood park

remembering you on memorial day

2008-05-25T22:22:00.001-07:00

small town
you already did your tour
runnin about town in that souped up camaro
i liked you instantly
packed all of our belongings
but we made it
barely
tumbleweeds, tarantulas, but where are the cowboys?
settled in fine
young but not alone
you know, 1+1=3
we'd sit and rock
you'd both fall asleep
second tour and you were relieved
where you relieved?
i'd watch you two
gymnastics, t-ball, motorcycles, soccer, football, 3 wheelers, basketball, hockey
you did it all, he did it all, we did it all
i'll never forget
what you gave
for him
for us
3-1=2

...what am i?

2008-05-17T19:48:00.000-07:00

i walk about the streets neglected..
..seen many places..
tho i seem to get around undetected..

the years you know, have worn me thin..
..somewhat tattered..
tho tossed about, i never wonder where i've been..

protruding nail didn't cause my pain..
..no patches here..
no doctors fees for someones gain..

you need me more than i need you..
...i'm sometimes smelly
when it's time you will renew..

nothing seems to offer me solace..
..tho i can be costly..
you'll find me in your bottom closet..

...in memory...happy mothers day mom......

2008-05-08T22:32:00.000-07:00

My Mom was something else. She would say the funniest things..sometimes the most embarrassing things to us kids..I remember her laughing so hard she would cry and not be able to stop....I think fondly of her...everyone loved her..truly...she was a magnet, everyone loved to be around her. A small irish woman with a big big heart...I saw her chase down my 6 ft brother once....and catch him! Here are some writings of one of my sisters about our Mom. 'happy mother's day'

Thank You Dr Feurst

Mom had been to the doctor many times during the end of her time here but I remember one trip years earlier when I went with her to see her favorite doctor, Dr Feurst. Now Mom thought he was the cutest thing and loved going to see him. I was inclined to agree with her as I had a secret crush on him. I was pretty young at the time and as a lot of young people are self centered, I was no different. I remember being ashamed of the way she was. She was loud and brash and in my eyes, she said the most humiliating things. Oh, the receptionist laughed when Mom made an inappropriate comment. (I thought it was out of politeness).

We were called back into the room to wait for the doctor and I remember feeling a little antsy. Wishing that I wasn't there. Wishing that he wouldn't associate me with this hillbilly of a women. When the doctor walked into to the room, he greeted her as if they were old friends. I thought he also was just being polite and professional. And there went Mom. Telling him how she was feeling, interjecting bits of humor about her day and her life. I watched his face to see the signs of disinterest, of impatience at wasting his time....I saw none of that. Instead, I saw his face fill with laughter at what she was saying. He was asking questions and was interested in her responses. I began to see Mom in a whole new light. I felt ashamed at feeling ashamed of her. Mom grew 10 feet in my eyes that day. When we were leaving, he told her that she was his favorite patient and the way he said it, you knew he meant it. I never felt ashamed of Mom after that-it was like a veil was lifted. I had always loved her and thought she was funny but I never knew that other people saw her that way too. Thank-you Dr Feurst for letting me accept my Mom for who she was. A funny, warm and totally whacky women who was always there for you. She was true to herself and to others. I wish I was more like her. I love you Mom.

I Remember Ma

Sitting on the porch drinking a cup of black coffee with a cigarette in her hand.

Lying in bed with us gently rocking the mattress while singing every song she knew in her soft, gravely voice until we went to sleep.

Canning so many jars of tomatoes and as many jars of jelly as the berries that we picked.

Standing at the kitchen counter until everyone was done eating a meal so she could sit down to eat.

Baking home made bread, pies, biscuits, cakes and cookies all from scratch.

Strumming her guitar like no one else I knew. I couldn't do it with such ease and finesse no matter how hard I tried.

Laughing

Never picking a favorite child even when I kept pressing her to tell me..she'd always say "I love you all the same". And best of all, you never felt she had a favorite.

Digging out the back cellar bucket by bucket, shoveling coal into the furnace and allowing me to bank it, cutting the grass

Saying "Keep your legs closed"...that was the only conversation we ever had about sex.

Decorating the Christmas tree with bubble lights and ice cycles and assorted ornaments, some of which we made. We always had a real tree.

Getting mad. Her eyes would light up and she get this tone in her voice and you knew you'd better run.

Out running me when I was ornery and I playfully told her she'd never catch me.....

Whipping me once..I had to pull a switch off of the tree. I wonder what I did because she never beat us.......

Telling us to be home before the street lights came on.

Telling us that if we came in, we had to stay in.

Always being there just to sit and shoot the bull with about nothing in particular.

..a day in the life of....

2008-04-27T12:28:00.001-07:00

2008-04-27T12:18:00.001-07:00

Barbara Millicent Roberts

2008-04-22T23:33:00.000-07:00

When I turned 13 I gave my entire barbie collection to my niece. I regret that move, even to this day. I suppose I thought I was all grown up and shouldn't play with dolls. Why didn't I just put them away..for my daughter one day?
I must have been all of 7 years old. My mum took us to the salvation army to pick out some toys. I didn't even notice that those very ones, were eventually wrapped and put under the tree as our Christmas gifts that year. My favorite was an old barbie doll. She had black hair, almond eyes with eyeliner. I still think of that doll, not as much as what she would be worth nowadays...but, the fact that she was old....and unique. Oh, I still had my regular barbies. I used to crack their knees all the time..and bite their rubbery toes. They just don't make them like that anymore. I learned a new word that year: accessories. And accessories I had! So many outfits, purses, shoes. I can still smell the plastic! The case with the little hangers..what a delight for any small child! Even after all these years....I still yearn for my almond eyed barbie with the eyeliner...

Happy Birthday Blackbeards!

2008-04-19T16:02:00.000-07:00

...I've been from the east to the west coast and haven't found a more delicious nor consistent restaurant than Blackbeards' at South Padre Island in Texas.

'HAPPY 30TH BIRTHDAY'

No matter how often I go back to visit, the food is always just as delicious.

Homemade onion rings from 1015's, truly the biggest I've ever seen!

From burgers, to steak and seafood dinners, this will surely become a winner.

Hey Martin, if your still in the kitchen, hook me up with my favorite chicken...blackened ranchero over a plate of rice, with your special salsa perfectly spiced.

Hats off to the managers and the rest of the staff, who hold it together on our behalf.

So if you find yourself heading south, don't stop till you get to the gulf...

...stop in and grab a bite to eat.....you'll go back year after year...naturally!

Blackbeards' Restaurant

1,560 days...

2008-04-09T16:08:00.000-07:00

(how many tears have you shed my friend?)

Did each day get easier than the last?
Every mothers nightmare.
Anguish held it's grasp.

(1,560 days, do the tears still start your day?)

If love is measured in every tear that drops.
Your love for him won't ever stop.

(your love droplets filled so many buckets.)

It hurts me too, to see your pain.
For we all know he died not in vain.
He chose to live the best he knew how.
So humble his crown and you were so proud!

(the past lives in our future.)

If you look back at the road you've travelled, so many memories, the past is unraveled.
But those lessons in life help us to grow, help us to reach out to those that don't 'know'.
So, share his life with those that will listen, and your eyes shall surely glisten.

...te amo mi amiga..muchos besos..

in memory of: Rey David Cuervo ~ kia~8-29-79 - 12-28-03

...ennGAGE!

2008-04-05T13:20:00.001-07:00

...when my soon to be boyfriend said he watched Star Trek, I figured him to be a nerd. Yah, I used to watch the original Star Trek reruns back in the day..but, anything that came along after that seemed to be strictly only for the Trekkie's..I've seen pictures of them going to their conventions in full attire...I imagined 'him' with Spock ears..
He said I should watch an episode, they were really good.
...then...
I did.
...now...
Am hooked.
After watching TNG and Voyager, I sometimes find myself running about the house saying: 'set your phasers on stun!'...or...'I am Borg..resistance is futile...'
I even imagine 'round halloween how I can make myself up to be some sort of android or alien. Hats off to the writers who make it all so believable..so memorable...
...Janeway OUT!

...i love to shop!

2008-04-02T16:31:00.001-07:00

My favorite place is this small town called Volant in Pennsylvania about an hour north of Pittsburgh on 79. It's nestled in the country with rolling hills, and I recommend going in the fall to catch the changing of the leaves. During some of the fall festivals you can watch them make homemade apple butter outside in huge kettles. Be sure to pick up a walking map and the houses are numbered so you'll know which ones are stores and private homes. Start off at Volant Mills and you'll enjoy 3 floors of crafts galore! They have a converted schoolhouse and a train for your shopping pleasure filled with crafts & goodies to buy. Your senses will be tempted with homemade baked goods, chocolate, spices, & jam. Drive a bit down the road, and you'll come across an Amish family selling homemade bread and cookies by the roadside. If your interested, they'll even take you inside their barn to sell you quilts and crafts. Since your in the area, your shopping experience will not be complete until you stop by at Sugar Creek also, and shop, shop, shop!!! You must dedicate a whole day for this excursion, and believe me, you won't be disappointed!!! Here is a sample of whats in store!

1906 Mercantile & Doll Company
211 Main Street, Volant, PA 16165,
Located in a quaint century-old home, this unique store is filled with a wide variety of unique gifts and accessories including Victorian accents, primitives, candles, reproduction lighting, rugs, quilts,
tinware, and much more to decorate your home.

shop volant!
volantshops.com

...a good read.

2008-03-31T19:46:00.000-07:00

...I'm not very good at writing reviews...but, I was so angry with the film maker...I had to stop watching it and vent. I would encourage everyone to read the book 'The Namesake' by Jhumpa Lahiri, and invite no one to watch the film by Mira Nair. I mean, hey, most of the time the book is better, right?? You can almost expect the film to not be as good. But, this one truly truly sucked. It was hard to follow, you literally didn't know what was going on..and only because I read the book, did I finally start to figure out what was happening. The introduction to the characters were totally non existent, and the film just seemed too rushed to even get a grasp. I pity those folks who watched it first and never read the book. Maybe I should pity Mira Nair..........and the casting..tsk tsk.....I just couldn't get 'Kumar' out of my head wanting to go get Whitecastles...what a poor obvious(?) choice of main character. And Mira...next time you decide to do an ethnic film...leave rap out of it.....not unless your head bangin with the homies in the hood....

...mommy stay home!

2008-03-23T11:38:00.000-07:00

Can someone please tell me why a woman would join the army on her own free will, and later complain that she's not at home watching her children grow up???? Just what was she thinking?
Or why people want to get out of the military because they can't/don't want to kill???
The military isn't a vacation. What do you think your getting trained for???
Yeah, you can get an education, make rank and some money, but the bottom line is: your constantly training for war.
People, before you sign up, make sure it's what you really want to do. Women, stay home and take care of your babies.
The rest of ya, if your first thoughts aren't about maybe being killed in a war, stay out of it.

...just a few of my favorites...

2008-03-20T21:51:00.000-07:00

SPANISH
Mana - Mariposa Traicionera & Rayando El Sol
Elefante - De La Noche A La Manana & Milagro De Amor

AFRICAN
Habib Koite & Bamada - Bitile & Cigarette Abana
Magic System - Premier Gaou
Ladysmith Black Mambazo - Shosholoza

FOLK
Joan Baez - Hello In There & Sweet Sir Galahad
Indigo Girls - Strange Fire & Jonas & Ezekiel
Carpenters - Reason To Believe

OLDIES
The Paris Sisters - I Love How You Love Me
Marvin Gaye - Let's Get It On
Temptations - Just My Imagination

COUNTRY
Dwight Yoakum - Turn It On,Turn It Up,Turn Me Loose
Dolly Parton - I Will Always Love You
Dolly,Linda & Emmylou - Telling Me Lies

CLASSIC ROCK
David Bowie - Lady Grinning Soul & Big Brother
Jimmy Buffett - A Pirate Looks At Forty & Havana Daydreamin'
Chris Isaak - Wicked Game

JAZZ
Magic Rings - Again and Again

HIP HOP
Tupac - Runnin' & Where Do We Go From Here
Timbaland- Scream
Bizzy Bones - Nobody Can Stop Me

GYPSY
Ando Drom - Zsa Mo
Goran Bregovic - Ederlezi
Romano Drom - Szatele Szav

...agitated!

2008-03-10T20:46:00.000-07:00

...today. agitation got the best of me. so much, in fact, i decided to pen it.
...i didn't wake up agitated, it kind of grew on me, like a festering wound....as the day wore on..my patience wore thin...
...i got agitated when...
.....my pants didn't fit right, my hair didn't lay right, my skin didn't feel right.....
.....i had to work late for my sick employee.....
.....i couldn't work out.....
.....work issues...well, just work issues.....
.....finding out there's meds in our water system.....
.....my boyfriend didn't read my mind and already have 'that chore' done when i got home late.....
.....i got home late.....
.....i napped way too long and have to go to bed in an hour.....
..... i won't be able to sleep in an hour.....
.....my pc ran slow and i wanted to smash it.....

*ding *ding
agitated=1
rita=0

WHAT IF....reprised

2008-03-05T21:30:00.000-08:00

...no two snowflakes ARE alike
...the war in Iraq WAS over oil
...the world DID end in 2012
...Jesus WAS married
...dreams COULD foretell our future
...butter WAS only one molecule away from plastic
...cats and dogs WERE color blind
...America REALLY owned (cough) america
...Hitler WAS part Jewish
...dinosaurs DIDN'T exist
...Hilary BECOMES president
...a can of coke COULD dissolve rust
...you HAD aids
...Michael Moore really HAS a grasp
...the phone doesn't ring..IT'S me

...don't be afraid of it!

2008-02-20T18:41:00.000-08:00

It was in the middle of the day and the second vision I've ever had. I was at the top of this hill where I am from, and I can see the trees all around me. A huge bubble appears and I see the colors mixing and rotating around its outer fragile shell....just like the bubbles we used to blow when we were kids. All of a sudden I am drawn up into it, feet first until I am fully encapsulated. I see nothing except what I would describe light to be, and I feel something like I've never felt before, penetrating my whole being. Words cannot describe that wonderful feeling, nor have I ever felt like that again. I can only imagine the source to be Godly and I am not afraid...
In experiencing that, you would think that when the 'day' finally arrives, I shall be ready?????
Well, not exactly. I've become extremely wishy washy in my thinking nowadays, but the truth be told, it's a pretty scary thought. Death. What REALLY is going to happen?
The fact of the matter is, we were born to die. It's inevitable for us all. Our bodies are ever decaying even after death. From the beginning of time, from the first man unto the last, this will always happen, yet it seems we have never quite learned how to deal with death. Is it because of our own selfish reasons? Our self-attachment to the person how has died? Our faithlessness? I've tried to read up on it a bit, and still come to the same conclusion as, 'I'm just not sure what's going to happen.' The fact remains, do we really know? We all certainly will find out one day.
1. We're all going to die, but I think it's the way I'm going to die bothers me. Of course we all want to go fast and in our sleep, but, it hardly happens that way. Why am I so afraid to die? Is it because I'm getting older, and the end seems nearer? Is it because the last 4 people that died in my immediate family died a horrible death?? I always wonder what the 'crossover' is going to be like. Will we know? Will we feel any pain? Will we really see the light? Will we be bludgeoned to the bowels of hell? Will God meet us at the gate? Will we, will we, will we???
There's only so many things that can happen......really.
2. One goes gloriously to heaven. Or horribly to hell. There is nothing after death, or our spirits just float about. I think it would be torture to know when one is dead and still be able to see the living, but not communicate. To see the livings pain and suffering, or how well their getting on without us!!
3. To top that all off, what if there really is reincarnation???? Whoa!

I think of my family that has gone before me, some quickly, some not so....but I know they got through it....somehow......and I too, at the end of my day, will get through it, and I shall know, just like the ones before me. So, in saying this, I shall hope that God meets me at the gate, and I once again, shall see my family and my friends...that's how I want it to end.

...TO MY VALENTINE!

2008-02-08T17:08:00.000-08:00

........i scaled the cliff in hopes of finding you,

my imprints left behind for yet another's climb...

........i easily imagined what would bestow me,

when i reached my summit…

........the beauty in widespread wonder.

........unknowingly, you led the way, and my heart

just followed the path...

........i reached for that last hold, and lifted myself ,

and there you already were...

........waiting at the edge...and you took my bleeding hands...

........and you kissed away the pain....as we stepped off together...

in loves mysterious refrain….

to cmk

love...ritatortilla

....in dreams...

2008-02-05T14:35:00.000-08:00

My dreams have always fascinated me. I wish I could paint them. I wish I could interpret them. Let me share a few of my really weird dreams...
....I started having this dream for about 5 months of my old dog Racer. I would suddenly realize I hadn't been in my home for months and that I left my dog in there without food & water. I would be afraid to go in and find him either dead, or the whole place ransacked and smelly. Then, one night I dream I was in my hometown park, and Racer trots up to me. (I notice he's not malnourished but fat), and he says to me: 'you know, you really got to start feeding me', in this real deep husky voice. Now, the fact he spoke to me didn't surprise me, it was the fact of how fat he was. The next dream, my house catches on fire, Racer dies and I never dreamed of him again..
....I dream I'm near a creek,and I can see the water flowing. To the right is a large apartment building. Everything is in black and white. I'm standing, staring at the water, and I'm very afraid. I know something is wrong, something is about to happen. Tho I don't see it in my dream, I have a vision that a young, small long blond-haired girl is floating down the creek and she is dead..
....I do notice my dreams sometimes are put together of events that happen throughout the day, or something I've watched on t.v. The one I had the other night was super super scary, yet, it sounds funny now when I think about it.
....I have this dream I'm talking to Mike Rowe and I suddenly get this feeling something is amiss, that we're being infiltrated by something evil. I can't see them, but, in another dimension, people are scattered about in hats and trench coats, and I know they are bad and indestructible. Well, Mike gets blown out of my dream by one of these guys, and I huddle in a corner of a building thinking 'this can't be happening'..paralyzed with fear, I see 'them' almost floating by, and someone is saying, 'mind the gap'...and I know I'm in the safe place and I think I'm in it, when one of these guys comes to me and says to stand in the doorway, with my hands outstretched...and I'm afraid, and I listen to him, thinking this is 'the gap', and when I'm there, I cannot move, and one of these guys comes towards my face with a drill coming out of his arm, and starts to drill into my forehead, and I can hear it, and feel it, all of the pain, and I'm thinking, how can this be happening? Then they put this drill in my mouth, and it clamps my jaw open, and I can feel them drilling inside of my mouth, and the pain....and I awake....

...a little piece of heaven!

2008-02-01T20:15:00.000-08:00

South Padre in the summer can be quite hot. The island being only 23 miles long and 1/2 mile at it's widest, walking anywhere affords you the tranquil beauty of the sea or bay. A place where, when my feet hit the sand, the cares of the world seemed to just drift away...away like the waves crashing against the shore, ever changing the sandy scenery. Yes, it can be quite hot, but floating in the pool in the heat of the night, ears below the water in an odd echoey deafness, staring up at the gazillions of stars twinkling in the sky......ahhh I can just feel it now.
I used to sit on the beach during the winter, that was 'my summer'..when hardly anybody was there, except for the older winter Texans~and for once, I was the reining bathing beauty of the beach. I would stare at the ocean's horizon for hours, and still not quite catch the beauty of it. Hearing the seagulls in the distance, sound of the waves, toes dug deep into the sand, and feeling the salt air on my face......ahhh I can just feel it now.
I really found that little piece of heaven..that was my sanctuary. The cares of the world wasn't allowed out there, I wouldn't let it. There's something about the way the sky, earth, and sea meet. The trinity. I always felt like I was drawn there, unbeknownst to me.
But, after all those years, all those days, hours, minutes sitting there, I can still close my eyes, and my mind takes me there...even tho I am here, and I can feel the sun on my skin, as the gulf breeze lifts my hair, I hear the seagulls in the distance...waves crashing against the shore, the smell of the salt air......ahhh I can just feel it now.......

...take me home...

2008-01-30T14:37:00.000-08:00

...I've done my share of walking past the homeless, trying not to look at them. I've done my share of not wanting to make eye contact...who carries money around these days?? Everything's plastic. I'm waiting for the day when I'm asked: "hey lady, can you spare a gift card???"
I do look tho...I sneak my peeks before I reach them...I'm curious as to how they got there. I watch the documentaries on them. Fascinates me really, and saddens me too. If you help one, there's another on the next block. How can you stop? How can you start? The documentaries say they spend it on drugs or alcohol anyway. That's my reasoning for not helping.
....He came into where I work asking for a job. He looked as cleaned up as I think he could ever get. I had such pity for him..he reminded me of somebody, but I wasn't quite sure who. I tried to give him as much dignity and respect as I could. He said he could do anything, and I told him we really didn't need anybody, but.....if he gave me his number.... just what was I thinking???? I'll never forget his face. He wrote down his name on a piece of paper. I told him if we ever needed help, I'd let him know..I asked for his number again...he wrote down his social security number. I could have cried. I kept that paper for a long time. As a reminder mostly. Maybe it was not to forget. I finally shredded and threw it away. I felt a bit guilty, having such private information. That was all he could give me. That was all he had. Before he left, he said "I'm homeless, and I just need a job" ...........

granma venegaz

2008-01-28T19:02:00.000-08:00

Granma was cool. Really. She had this way about her.
She never walked in a straight line, but side to side, I liked that about her.
She could play you a mean game of Trouble, and blame you for cheating!
On New Years Eve, she always had her entire house spotless, even her linens ironed, A LOT of food cooked, cuz she believed what you did on the eve, was how you lived all year.
I loved the smell of her kitchen downstairs, kind of like wooden matchsticks and hot peppers on the skillet.
She always had a stack of fresh tortillas for every meal and would insist even if you weren't hungry - "EAAAAT EAAAAT". I do believe I've had one tortilla too many!!!
I loved it when we were allowed to go upstairs, I'd sit on her couch and she'd play the piano, odd, I remember the curtains there, they were paisley. There was a hallway that I called secret since it wrapped around the house in a weird manner.
We'd go outside in the back yard and eat sour grapes till they were coming out our ears.
We'd sit on the bench in the front, and I can still smell her roses.
She loved bingo and I always said: 'she died doing what she loved'....
Granma's half brother was the President of Mexico from 1964-1970. Her maiden name was Ordaz and was born in Zacatecas.

...let's catch those predators!

2008-01-28T16:52:00.000-08:00

...I have to say I'm very thankful for Chris Hansen's 'To Catch A Predator'. It's amazing how many sexual predators there are out there. I truly hope each and every one will be caught and sent to prison. Just the very thought of what these men/women want to do to these children is sickening. I feel so badly for the children involved. How much pain and torture they must go through. Not to mention the psychological affects it has on them.

check this out: to catch a predator
if they're in your neighborhood: criminal check
and my new favorite to truly expose these creeps: perverted justice
I hate to post these next links, but, it gives you an idea of what's out there, and how could these people not get arrested, tho they fight they are doing no wrong and breaking no laws: nambla
Oh, let's not leave out the sick women out there: sick sick women (update: that website was finally taken down)

...when good lovin'goes bad...

2008-01-28T15:49:00.000-08:00

Someone once asked me 'at what point in a relationship does it go bad?' I think we all know. I've talked to a lot of guys and gals. I've come to this conclusion. (from her viewpoint)

Good lovin' goes bad when...

...you stop 'courting' me...I still like getting flowers, poems and impulse gifts...
...you stop talking to me...suddenly I've become boring to you..I'm still the same...
...you'd rather chat to someone on the net than me...I used to be that one...
...you change the pass-code to retrieve voice messages...and it's my phone too!
...you become rude and critical with me...only forces me to become rude and critical with you...
...you stop being a gentleman...opening my car door, carrying a heavy bag always made me feel special...
...you embarrass and make me look bad in front of your friends...just who are you trying to impress anyway???
...you stop reaching for my hand on long walks...only breaks my heart...
...you give me a quick peck on the cheek at bedtime...remember when we used to tickle our tonsils?
...you stop telling me I'm beautiful...and.............I still am.

...that tiger went...

2008-01-27T16:31:00.000-08:00

By now some of you may have heard about the very unfortunate incident at the San Francisco Zoo. Tatiana, a Siberian tiger, got out (somehow) killed a guy (horrible) and mauled two others. (How could this happen??) The cops shot and killed her. Let me back up a minute. Some people would say the tiger went crazy???? I agree with Chris Rock when he said, "The tiger went TIGER!" (when talking about the Sigfried & Roy incident) Take an animal out of it's natural habitat and cage it. How natural is that? It's a wild animal which belongs out in the wild. What do we expect??? Really? Chris said, "the tiger went crazy when he had to ride around on a bicycle with a Hitler helmet on...the tiger didn't go crazy, the tiger went tiger".... Anyway, I'm upset the tiger was even in that zoo to get out. I'm upset those people died and got mauled. I'm upset the cops killed her. But, that's what we do. Check out an excerpt from Chris Rock on the tiger incident...
chris rock~youtube

...dirty girl

2008-01-27T09:19:00.000-08:00

....He'd come to work out. I didn't have a clue who he was. To me, he was just another member. He didn't have a pass, he was a v.i.p. but then again, we have a lot of those. He seemed friendly enough, always smiling, never talked much. One day someone said "do you know who that is??" I said no. They said "Mike Rowe". I said so? Then it was explained to me. I never watched the show. I really didn't want to. I wanted to keep my same impression of him. But now, I'd greet him with "Mike Rowe, how the heck are ya??" I was now on a first name basis. He'd come into the club when he was in town. He has an apartment here in the city. Nobody ever bothered him, except me. When I told my son he worked out here, he about had a heart attack. He said he LOVED his show and could I get an autograph? I told Mike I was a celebrity in my family for knowing him. Then I blushed and said "well, I don't really know you", and he smiled and said "sure you do!". I said "my son.." and he said " wants an autograph right?" and I said yes. He said no problem, when he comes back in town, he'll bring some pictures. Mike Rowe is true to his word. I had to get one for me too. I finally watched his show. There was a Sunday afternoon marathon, to which I watched every single one. Now I see what the hullabaloo is all about. It's a great show. He's really funny. He smiles a lot. He's pretty much true to self. I still have managed to keep my same impression of him.
dirty jobs

...some old haunts of mine

2008-01-26T20:01:00.001-08:00

...ode to my best friend.

2008-01-26T09:43:00.000-08:00

... I cannot imagine life with drugs. I only know life without it. I'm one of the lucky ones, really. Too never quite had the need or desire for it. I was always a little chicken to try it. Peer pressure never kept an upper hand on me, thankfully.
-now your trapped in your cocoon, let the ties that bind be loosed-
-let your spirit free...twirling thru eternity-
..my brain says go, my heart says no, do you know how much I'll miss you? I'm really trying to avoid this issue. Dear God, I'm looking for that special token, because I'm broken, hopin...for that miracle inscribed token....(hopin...)
-now your wings will soon be spread, no more sadness, fear nor dread-
-soon you'll twirl thru eternity...happily you'll ever be-
...with all my heart, and with all my love, to my best friend...

"gam zeh ya’avor"
"and this too shall pass" - tjs

WHAT IF????

2008-01-22T16:59:00.000-08:00

2008-01-18T19:51:00.000-08:00

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run. Dennis Miller

Alright, maybe my first post shouldn't be so controversial, but it's definitely something that's been bothering me for quite some time now. Fat cops!

It's really none of my business what they look like, really, but I'm wondering if they're in shape enough to run after assailants?

I think Dennis said it right when he said "you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop." Nuff said.

I guess America, really on the average is overweight. I shouldn't just pick on cops. Heart attacks and cholesterol will kill us quicker anyway.